Sunday, January 3, 2010

Help My Marriage - Heed This Advice

By Sabrina Summerfield

It is possible to help my marriage so that you can save your marriage. Any situation can be overcome and there are many workshops and programs available that help couples stay together and be happy. One of the main steps to saving your marriage is communication but that is not all as just listening or talking may not solve the actual problem. Many times juggling work and kids can cause a strain that feels like you and your spouse are becoming strangers.

Therapy is recommended as a way to help both of you communicate. Though many may have issues with telling their personal issues to an outsider sometimes that outside perspective is just what the relationship needs. You also need to make time to be with each other no matter how busy your schedule is. This is a priority and needed for all happy marriages. You also do not need to agree all the time as long as your disagreements are constructive and do not get blown out of proportion.

It is important to help my marriage early. If you let years go by before looking for help then the chances of losing your marriage increase greatly. You also will be unhappier longer and it is better to get help early so you and your partner can be happy. It is also important to edit your conversation. You do not need to say every critical thought running through your head. Instead stick to the important ones and let the little things go.

The tone of voice and manner in which you broach issues is also important. Being calm and using a quiet tone of voice tends to result in faster outcomes with no one becoming upset. If you yell and place the blame immediately on your partner then there is a good chance that the issue will not be resolved and the arguments may drag on for some time.

It is also important not to set the bar too high, as no one is perfect. Many newlyweds will have high standards for their partners and have difficulty with forgiveness. Being able to be influenced and flexible with your partner will go along way. Many researchers find that men have more difficulty with this then women. If your partner needs some help and you have plans then it will go a long way to change your plans to help your partner. It is not necessary to do this every time but your partner will appreciate it when you do.

The art of exiting an argument is very important, as you want to head off any arguments that appear to be blowing out of proportion. You can accomplish this by changing the subject, using humor, reminding your partner that you are on their side, telling them that you care and more. It is also important not to dwell on the negative as those that stay positive including how they remember and are in their relationship will have a healthier relationship in the long run and this is an easy but effective way to help my marriage.

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