Wednesday, January 20, 2010

Super Self Help Marriage Guidelines.

By Sabrina Summerfield

Recognise problems exist- The first step to solving marital problems is to recognise that there are actually problems in the relationship. An endless list of excellent self help marriage tips are available to pick and choose once your know what the exact problems are at "Save My Marriage Today" www.savemymarriagetoday.com. Once problems are identified couples should try as hard as they possibly can to be objective about the troubles, no matter how hopeless or frustrated they feel. Lack of endurance and denial of the problems will lead to the problems increasing and breeding until they are out of control.

When will you need a counsellor?- It is imperative to rather seek the assistance of a counsellor sooner rather than later. If the couples show any blame-shifting or denial behaviour as well as problems in the general household with conflict management and resolution, a counsellor should be the first person to call.

Objectivity- When deciding on a marriage counsellor it is imperative to realise that you need not use only Psychologists or Ministers in other words qualified professionals. As long as the person is good listener, honest, trustworthy and objective in their feelings towards the couple as well as in his or her overall opinion, they will be suitable to handle the matter successfully. Old married couples are excellent counsellors. They have the knowledge and experience to give you advice and guide you on a range of situations and problems they have had personal experience of during their martial life.

Silver linings- Every dark cloud has a silver lining and so do marriages going through dark spots and turmoil. Make a list of all your partners' negative and positive characteristics. You will clearly see that the pro's outweigh the con's by far.

Open you heart and mouth- Open you heart and mouth and tell your partner how you feel. A lack of proper communication is often to blame for problems in a marriage. Bottled-up sadness or hurt cannot be turned into happiness and healing without communication. Share your feels, emotions, fears and expectations with your husband or wife. Misunderstandings can also be avoided by just practicing honest and open communication techniques.

Take time- Take alone time for yourself as well as with spouse. A little time apart will help you realise how special the person is to you and how much you miss him or her. While on the other hand spending time apart may have the opposite effect of causing spouses to drifting apart or loose touch with their partners' feelings and needs. It is absolutely essential to spend quality time together even if it only via appointment. Enjoy the time together. Avoid arguments and fighting as well as any subject that have to possibility of leading to conflict. Find more fantastic hints to save your marriage at "Save My Marriage Today".

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1 comment:

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