Wednesday, January 6, 2010

Win Back Your Ex For Good

By Nicole Barry

In your wild efforts to stop a break up in a relationship and the desire to bring back your ex, you might actually be making a big mistake all the way. In stead of piecing up all the conflicts and winning back your ex-lover, you could be further damaging the relationship.

Are you sure you are not committing any of the ten common breakup gaffes?

Informing your ex-wife what a monumental mistake they are making: This won't make them hesitate and think it over, rather they will think about what a mistake it was to get romantically involved with you in the beginning.

Ringing too soon after the break up:

A phone too quickly after the break up can be very stifling, since your ex wants some time on their own now, otherwise why would she or he leave?

Drunk Dialing:

Alcohol can play havoc with your emotions right now as soon after a few drinks you feel like to talking to your ex.

Sending mailbox full of emails or countless messages on voice mail These activities very rarely help, on the contrary it may make the situation take a turn for the worse.

Sharing your feelings of being lost, desperate and low with your ex since the time both of you broke up. You may think this will attract your ex-partner's sympathetic nature but you are charging them with your emotions and consuming them with your neediness instead. Psychologically speaking this type of conduct is termed as ?manipulative' and could throw a stick badly in any relationship.

Continuing to argue about the separation and rake up past discrepancies and squabbles: This would doubtless attract attention and could maybe result in some conversation but think about it, is this the way you would like to utilize your time? This is really ineffective both in the long and short term and in some way keeps you where you started.

Repeatedly showing your ever-lasting love Please note that even if your ex realized the depth and strength of your love, this is really not the greatest worry at this time, or else the ex-lover would not have become an ex-partner. This is the right time to view the position in a wholly new light and dissect the past to find what precisely went bad rather than relying on the strength of your love to assist you tide over the situation.

Admitting your regret over and over again. Now possibly you did something wrong, possibly even you genuinely blew it by being unfaithfull or breaking a big promise. An apology is in order, but you have to know the correct way to make an effective apology and rarely anyone knows how thi is done. You also don't want to make the slip up of saying sorry too soon. All The Same, if you didn't do something that justifies an apology, then you are compromising yourself and this isn't an appealing trait in anybody.

Trying to make your ex-lover jealous:

Ok, this might work for some psychological reason's, and maybe a little bit won't hurt as people incline to desire what they can't have, but it still won't change the grounds for the break up in the first place. In case you are trying to use clever maneuvering methods to get back your exwife, what would take place is that the relationship would turn very complicated, which would be hard to keep up in the long run.

Pleading with them to take you back:

Let me tell you something here. Anyone worth his salt and confident about him or herself would never turn that desperate, which justifies being backwards just to get back some person in life. Now that you know what bloomers to avoid when trying to win back your partner back it's time to get a better perspective on where the relationship went wrong , and what needs to change and then you can begin planning a SMARTER strategy for getting your ex back.

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