Wednesday, December 30, 2009

I Don't Know If He Is My Boyfriend, Partner or More?

By Alan Bentley

Why is it so difficult, sometimes to work out what kind of relationship you actually have with this guy? You may be quite comfortable with him and have been going out for some time, settling into something of a routine. Sure, you like him, but where is this going -- is he your boyfriend, partner or something else?

As dating can be so difficult, full of ups and downs and a roller coaster ride, it must also be a steady process of discovery. Don't think that you can shortcut the process and get to the happy time when you have a husband and children to take care of and remember that this journey should always be, underneath it all, enjoyable.

If you don't know whether this guy is boyfriend, partner or husband material after some time dating, then the chances are that he is none of the above. After a natural period Of getting to know each other, you should both have that gut feeling and know whether it is really going to work or not. Don't just stay together for the sake of doing so as this is unfair to both of you in the long run.

We can all agree that it is difficult to find the right guy to be with and to be sure that you have made the right decisions. Do consider what you are looking for and where you are, though as if you are just very lonely and craving company then is he really your boyfriend, partner or just a friend?

Don't be tempted to assign a title to your relationship too quickly, especially if you have just gone through a string of less than inspiring associations. Nobody said that dating was easy and it will always be something of a process of elimination, until you find the one that is just right for you and vice versa.

Dating is always about compromise to a certain extent and will always require a modification of behaviors or positions and a gradual understanding and acceptance of the other person. This is quite natural and is part of the journey from boyfriend, partner or husband.

Our inner self really knows what is right and wrong and is probably talking to you even though you may choose to ignore it. Now is the time to have a frank and honest discussion with this guy and don't worry, you will most likely end up as good friends anyway after it is all said and done.

If you think -- here we go again -- then yes, it can certainly be traumatic to reset the dating clock. But it does help to build our character and we will be able to learn from our experiences. why not do a little bit of research before the next time to see what other people in your situation have got to say. It can't but help?

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