You men out there like to think that the ladies are the only ones with a head full of neurotic, insecure, unreasonable relationship behavior. Let me clue you in to a bit of reality, manfriends: just because you're "super laid-back" (meaning: toilet seat can stay up, laundry can go unwashed) doesn't mean that you aren't making your fair share of love missteps. Because you are.
And from the perspectives of date, girlfriend, and platonic pal, we ladies have watched you make them all. So let's get constructive; here's what you're doing wrong. Now cut it out:
1. Electronic distractions while having a serious conversation
Same goes for playing online poker (or anything else online), video games, texting; pretty much anything that diverts your attention from the conversation you're having. It's rude, it's obnoxious and it makes us feel worthless, so cut it out. Simply giving your lady friend your undivided attention is going to get you pretty far.
2. Not being honest with yourself and others about your relationship status
Too many men avoid using the word "boyfriend" altogether in the same way that women tend to use it too soon. If you know what kind of relationship you want, and it's not a monogamous one, then more power to you; but you need to be honest about it.
If you're having sleepovers, introduced her to your friends and you've met hers and you're not doing this with anyone else, you have a girlfriend. That's just the way it is. If you don't like that, do something about it.
3. Inquiring about the purpose of flowers
Or anything else that women love but seem totally irrational to you. The fact that the flowers will die in a few days doesn't matter, nor does spending money on something that won't live to see next week. We love them and we love the fact that you bought them for us. Moreover, stop applying reason to the small emotional pleasures of life. It's futile.
Just accept the fact that she likes what she likes. Spend more time focusing on the how than the why. As in how it makes her feel and how it makes you look totally awesome.
4. The Double Standard
I'm not one for gross over generalizations, but men are worse than women where double standards are concerned. You want her to focus all her attention on you, but then you launch into a rant about how it didn't mean a thing when she gets upset about your flirt fest with the busty bartender. Bottom line is this; if you want, you have to give. Simple.
And from the perspectives of date, girlfriend, and platonic pal, we ladies have watched you make them all. So let's get constructive; here's what you're doing wrong. Now cut it out:
1. Electronic distractions while having a serious conversation
Same goes for playing online poker (or anything else online), video games, texting; pretty much anything that diverts your attention from the conversation you're having. It's rude, it's obnoxious and it makes us feel worthless, so cut it out. Simply giving your lady friend your undivided attention is going to get you pretty far.
2. Not being honest with yourself and others about your relationship status
Too many men avoid using the word "boyfriend" altogether in the same way that women tend to use it too soon. If you know what kind of relationship you want, and it's not a monogamous one, then more power to you; but you need to be honest about it.
If you're having sleepovers, introduced her to your friends and you've met hers and you're not doing this with anyone else, you have a girlfriend. That's just the way it is. If you don't like that, do something about it.
3. Inquiring about the purpose of flowers
Or anything else that women love but seem totally irrational to you. The fact that the flowers will die in a few days doesn't matter, nor does spending money on something that won't live to see next week. We love them and we love the fact that you bought them for us. Moreover, stop applying reason to the small emotional pleasures of life. It's futile.
Just accept the fact that she likes what she likes. Spend more time focusing on the how than the why. As in how it makes her feel and how it makes you look totally awesome.
4. The Double Standard
I'm not one for gross over generalizations, but men are worse than women where double standards are concerned. You want her to focus all her attention on you, but then you launch into a rant about how it didn't mean a thing when she gets upset about your flirt fest with the busty bartender. Bottom line is this; if you want, you have to give. Simple.
About the Author:
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